The Constitutional Right of Parents to the Care, Custody and Nurturing of their Children.

Constitutional Right to Be a ParentFlorida Parental Rights

Yesterday Fathers and Families Ohio Director was featured in their latest newsletter. Don Hubin and I have an extensive history that goes back to when he brought me into the Father’s Rights movement with an organization called Parents And Children for Equality (PACE). As a Chapter Director, one of the first assignment that I had was working on the writing of what was the very first equal custody bill ever introduced in any state legislature (HB232).

I will not go into a lot of detail but that became a real eye opener on the workings of State Government and what it takes to create a law and what is need in preparation to trying to get that law passed. I can go into the many failings of Don during that process of that bill but that experience set my resolve to get this job done for every parent across the country.

He his latest rambling for F&F he attempts to fall back on the old Constitutional Rights argument that has failed in every level of the courts and is one that I broke away from using long ago. As Senator Skindell told me when I was able to completely explain the argument, “It is too complicated and will go over a legislator’s head”.

The question that needs to be posed to Don Hubin is why when there was a bill introduced that met all these requirements that you are now calling for, why did you choose to block that legislation? Is it because you didn’t do it Don and Fathers and Families could not profit from a successful bill passing? Hate to tell you Don, that mythical pot of gold does not exist.

The best thing that we can all do is tell them to stay away. Take your fund raising efforts to the suckers that you continue to hornswoggle with your words that you fail to back up with action and go away for the betterment of every parent in the nation.

BTW- What the real truth on Fathers and Families and their actions during SB144

That is why I continue to press the single question of “Why do we remove fit parents from the lives of our children?” Like the asking for a legal definition of “Best Interest of the Child” it is the loaded question that can be explained by anyone.  ~~  

— News  –  Jul 19, 2013


Parental Rights |

Below are excerpts of case law from state appellate and federal district courts and up to the U.S. Supreme Court, all of which affirm, from one perspective or another, the absolute Constitutional right of parents to actually BE parents to their children.

The rights of parents to the care, custody and nurture of their children is of such character that it cannot be denied without violating those fundamental principles of liberty and justice which lie at the base of all our civil and political institutions, and such right is a fundamental right protected by this amendment (First) and Amendments 5, 9, and 14. ~ Doe v. Irwin, 441 F Supp 1247; U.S. D.C. of Michigan, (1985).Amendment 14 US Constitution - 2015

The several states have no greater power to restrain individual freedoms protected by the First Amendment than does the Congress of the United States. Wallace v. Jaffree, 105 S Ct 2479; 472 US 38, (1985).

Continue reading “The Constitutional Right of Parents to the Care, Custody and Nurturing of their Children.”

Dads who are in a Messy Divorce w/Kids in the Middle?

Special Kind of Hell - 2016

Are You In a Messy Divorce w/Kids in the Middle?shared-parenting

Are you in a difficult divorce with children caught in the middle? Share your story with us–Iyanla Vanzant wants to hear from you.  Candidates can live anywhere in the United States and should be available to work with Iyanla in 2016.

Please go to form and fill out the fields and share your story so we can contact you for this once in a lifetime opportunity to join Iyanla on OWN.Tell Your Story - Blog 2015Please write a brief description about the conflict you would like resolved and who else is involved.  Please understand that those on both sides of the conflict will be asked to participate on a voluntary basis.

Dads: Is Your Ex Blocking You From Your Child?Dads - Is your ex blocking you from seeing your kid - 2016

OWN: Oprah Winfrey Network is looking for dads who cannot see their kid after divorce. If you are interested please fill out the form–this initiative has nothing to do with Erasing Family so please contact them with any questions. Best of luck!

The place for everything in Oprah’s world. Get health, beauty, recipes, money, decorating and relationship advice to live your best life on Oprah.com. 

I don’t know if this is an appropriate post for this group, and I know I am not a Father, or a man – I just felt inclined to write something from the perspective of a child – that has seen a father, my father, go through what so many of you are going through.

I know I can never fully fathom what my Father had went through, let alone the pain that is in all of your hearts, after being separated from your children – it’s absolutely devastating, and sickening that Mothers can turn so manipulative and mean, and cause so much pain, using children as a manipulation tactic against you. I know even after all of my Father’s rights were taken away (literally, from weekend visits, to supervised visits) because my Mother, like many of your ex’s lied to the court system, and completely eradicated any rights he did have.

My father once fought to the extremity to just even see us, call us, talk to us for five minutes on the phone, and it makes me so sad to know how much time had been wasted, not being able to even connect with my Father. With that being said there is hope, and this is what this comment was about. I know usually it does not come granted through the court system, since it’s completely biased, and one sided, but there is hope.

Never give up, because your children, everyday, think about you. Miss you, love you, and you are in their hearts and you will forever have a place there, there is nothing in this world that could replace you, you are planted there, like a tree, with roots of love that will never be eradicated by any court system, any manipulative mother, any lies, distance or time. I know there wasn’t a day that didn’t go by I didn’t think about my Father, and despite how I was deluded at a young age into believing my Father had neglected me, and abandoned me, i came to the realization the only person who lied to me was, of course, my Mother.

Through the pain, I still carried him with me in my heart, and everything that I am now, is because of the influence of my father – the memories I carried through out the years of him, the times we had together, most of my memories are tinged with him. I know this doesn’t change any of your situations. I don’t even know if this is appropriate. Just a comment of encouragement, reminding you all, that in all of your children’s heart, you are there – and you take up the vast majority. Despite your ex’s manipulative tactics, despite everything that has happened, despite the distance and time that goes by. You are there. In their hearts, and they will grow up and come to the realization, just how great of Fathers you all are. They will perceive further than the lies that their mothers have cast out, and when the courts or their Mothers have no hold on them anymore, they will find a way back to you.

Never give up – you are their light at the end of the tunnel. No matter how hard and how painful it is – and trust me, seeing how broken my father was, I have an idea of how hard it truly is, how much pain emitted from him. Again I cannot truly understand. I just wanted to tell you all, in case you were on the verge of giving up, or thinking that it’s too late, or that the mothers have completely brainwashed them. From the eyes of a child who saw this happen to my Father, just know. You are in our hearts, forever and always.

Keep fighting.

Amber Dawn – Nov 1Tell Your Story 2 - Blog 2015

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The Fatherless Effect On Women’s Relationships

    Introduction

     Children being raised without fathers is an epidemic in the United States that is on the rise.  When speaking of absentee fathers, I am referring to to fathers who are uninvolved or who appear every so often in a child’s life.   These fathers do not seem to realize that their absence negatively effects their children.  Most research focuses only on the children and not how the absence of a father continues to affect these children into adulthood.

My research paper delves into the topic of fatherless women and how their romantic relationships are affected. My favorite part of the paper is when I intertwine the fatherless woman syndrome with the adult attachment theoryi-am-a-fatherless-daughter-2015This is where the reader can see a clear connection and realize why some fatherless women have a string of bad relationships. Creating this research paper did prove to be a little difficult.

I originally wanted to investigate the effects of fatherlessness on both men and women . However, finding information pertaining to adult males was challenging. Almost all the information I found about fatherless adults were on women.  So the worst part of putting this research paper together was finding the information I needed.   The lack of information relates to the worst part of my paper. My paper only reveals the effects on fatherless women and not the effects on men.   Hopefully in the future research will start to emerge about men and how they too are affected.

Absentee Fathers and How They Effect Women’s Relationships

    Envision a child who can not remember how his or her fathers looks. That child constantly wonders if the men he or she passes by could in fact be daddy. This child has no memories of any special time spent with the father. The little girl or boy has no idea of the fathers personality. All he or she knows is that the stranger on the telephone who calls a few times a year, calls himself dad. Unfortunately, this scenario happens often to over twenty one million children across the United States (Linzy, 2011). These children have many negative outcomes from being raised without a father in their lives. But, the side effects do not just stop once that child turns eighteen. Often overlooked are the effects that an absentee father has on his adult children, particularly women.

    Women who have been raised without a father in their lives can be effected in various ways. Of particular importance is the way women’s romantic relationships are effected. John Bowlby developed the attachment theory which helps in understanding the intimate relationships between human beings. It is believed that if infants have an insecure relationship with their caregiver that normal social and emotional development will not occur (Fraley, 2010). In reference to fatherless women Blankenhorn (1996) states, “because they are deprived of a stable relationship with a non exploitative adult male who loves them, these girls, can remain developmentally ‘stuck,’ struggling with issues of security and trust that well fathered girls have already successfully resolved” (10).

    Looking at past research, it is possible to state that the attachment style of an adult in a relationship, may be a partial reflection on that adults experiences with his or her caregiver. Women who have been raised without fathers tend to experience insecurity within their relationships. The attachment styles that relate to these insecurities are preoccupied attachment, dismissing – avoidant attachment and fearful – avoidant attachment (Becker-Phelps, 2011) .

    Barras (2000) states, “There is a direct link between being fatherless and the likelihood of being in a dysfunctional relationship”.  Women who have been raised without a father often possess the fatherless woman syndrome (67). This syndrome consists of five primary categories that deal directly with a woman’s romantic relationships.  The first category in the fatherless woman syndrome is the un – factor.

This occurs when the woman suffers from low self esteem and feels that no one could ever want or love her. This correlates to the woman’s relationship as a child with her dad. According to Blankenhorn (1996), “A father plays a distinctive role in shaping a daughter’s sexual style and her understanding of the male – female bond.

A father’s love and involvement builds a daughters confidence in her own femininity and contributes to her sense that she is worth loving” (11). The woman who fits into this category may believe that because her father was not in her life, that she is not worthy enough to have anyone romantically involved in her life. Why would anyone want her if her own father did not? A woman who felt these feelings of unworthiness would possess the fearful – avoidant attachment style.

Women who are characterized with this attachment style tend to be distrusting of their partners and often have expectations of getting hurt by their partner (Becker-Phelps, 2011) . Unfortunately for the woman, she tends to act in a way that causes her significant other to end the relationship. So her prophecy becomes true, however she is unaware of her part in it (Barras, 2000, p. 67).

Continue reading “The Fatherless Effect On Women’s Relationships”