Alienation by Fire

We’ve all heard of the term “Baptism by Fire” but, I wonder how many have ever considered its meaning. In the Christian biblical sense, it essentially means that it is a baptism by the spirit and the trial of one’s faith. This means that a believer’s faith is tested or tried through some sort of difficulty or a series of mental and physical trials.

However, this meaning has largely been replaced and the meaning most often used according to the definition used by the Oxford dictionary is, ‘a difficult introduction to a new job or activity’. One example of this is of a soldier’s first experience of battle. ‘Baptism’ because battle is new to him and ‘fire’ from the firing of guns that is, he is ‘under fire’.

When we look at both explanations, we can actually see similarities that can be equated to the tests of which we face through the struggles in the alienation of our children. This is when we are tested in our faith that we will be reunited with our children. The other aspect of this, is that alienation is new to us and how we respond to the many obstacles is critical.i-survived-parental-alianation-2016

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Take The Bait

  1. Lawyers are predominately paid by the hour. They want you to PAY for COMMON KNOWLEDGE INFORMATION that exists within their industry while they can try to create conflict within your divorce. The scary part… only one of the two parties involved needs to “take the bait” and the other is forced to defend him/herself. Judges are lawyers elected into their respective position. Lawyers make donations into election / re-election funds of Judges. Are you aware that a Judge can continuously rule in favor of a firm and then get hired by that firm after they leave the bench? How much of this scenario defines “Justice” to you? Time=Money. Your money. The Family Court is a multi-BILLION dollar industry which goes unaudited and for the most part, unchecked.

  1. Missouri needs to proactively define it’s position for the Family Court, through law, regarding the complete protection and support of equal rights regarding the parent-child relationship before, during and after all divorce proceedings and modifications. Doing so, puts all parties “on notice” that the court will not tolerate anything but an amicable and fair solution if the case goes to trial, based on custody time requested by each party (except where certain custody restrictions are already in place due to statute).

  1. Creation of the “Fair Parent Initiative” requiring the courts to take a proactive stance to uphold the parent-child relationship with each parent through respective custody time. This includes requiring all parties involved (Spouses, Lawyers and the Judge) to sign a document explaining Missouri’s position and protection of the parent-child relationship. The document would also inform the parties of the commonly referred to “Ziegenthaler custody plan” (every other weekend, one night a week, plus holidays and vacation… etc).

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How Parental Alienation Manifests in School Settings

 

family-court-sponsered-child-abuse-via-pas-2015

Pt. 1 Get Educated About Alienation:

This is Parental AlienationHow Parental Alienation 

Manifests in a School or Educational Setting | Family Court Injustice

Broward County Public School conspires with Judge Manno-Schurr to enable Parental Alienation, a severe form of child abuse. http://iloveandneedmydaughter.blogspot.com/2013/04/reckless-disregard-true-and-compelling.html
Broward County Public School conspires with Judge Manno-Schurr to enable Parental Alienation, a severe form of child abuse.

Those who perpetrate alienation not only manipulate the child but often manipulate other people, even professionals, in their war against the targeted parent. This commonly happens as “triangulation” – when one parent (usually the abuser or alienator) uses a third party, like a teacher or school principal, to play against the other parent.

“Changing a child last name (away from the father’s) is an act of venom”

“Changing a child last name (away from the father’s) is an act of venom”

THE TRUTH BY ZORAYA'S MOTHER

THE TRUTH BY ZORAYA’S MOTHER

the-lie-in-alienation-2016

Parental alienation has various definitions but in a nutshell is when one parent works to damage a child’s relationship with the other parent (known as the “targeted parent”). As a result of alienation, child who previously had a close, loving, healthy (not abusive) relationship with the “targeted parent” then becomes estranged, hostile or rejects that parent. Many consider alienation a form of child abuse. The alienator may also elicit others—like educators—to similarly hate, reject or become hostile toward the other parent.

When alienation occurs in the school setting, the results are devastating: usually there is breakdown in communication between one parent and the educators (who have taken the side of the alienating parent, and may view the “targeted” parent in a negative light). The school may consciously or unconsciously reinforce the power and control tactics of the alienator, and sometimes the educators will even become personally involved in family court or custody litigation.

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This is Zoraya’s Family

There are cases where an educator has become so aligned with one parent that they will give that parent a favorable impression to the court while becoming hostile towards the “targeted parent”; finding fault, blaming and criticizing that parent, even in areas that have nothing to do with the child’s education.

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Alienated Parents Get Blame For Everything Bad?

Are Alienated Parents Blamed For Everything Bad? | Ryan Thomas Speaks I Child of Parental Alienation to Reunited Son

In this Video I answer Amy’s Question: Are alienated parents blamed for everything bad that happens in the child’s life?

NOTE: If you’re looking for tools to reach your child, change their thinking, create breakthroughs and take action to fight parental alienation…Check out my resources and SUBSCRIBE for more video insights, advice and support. 

Ryan Thomas I Source: Are Alienated Parents Blamed For Everything Bad? | Ryan Thomas Speaks I Child of Parental Alienation to Reunited Son

 

Happy Birthday Zoraya!

We Love You,  We Think About You,  We Miss You,  All the Time!

Zoraya - SV Week 9 003
ILoveandNeedmyDaughter.blogspot.com

She’s a soft cool rain on a hot summer’s day.

She makes me laugh with the funny things she has to say.

She’s the beat of my heart, and the air that I breathe.

She’s the sun and the wind, and autumn’s golden leaves.

She’s the pride that I feel when I know she’s done what’s right.

She’s that warm feeling I get, when I remember tucking her in at night.

You are a princess in my heart, and I care for you so much.I love the fondness in your eyes and your tender little touch.

I looked at you when you were born,And knew then straight away,That I would be forever hereTo watch you grow and play.

You bring to me a heart of joy, and memories so great,And a powerful sense of fatherhood that no one can debate.

I use to watch you sleep and dream of things that I can only wonder.

That innocent look upon your face just made my heart grow fonder.

I use to see you run and jump and shout and calling out my name…Papi!!

No love that I have ever known could ever feel the same.

No suffering or tragedy nor deeply seated pain could ever over shadow the bond that we retain.

And so my little princess before you go to sleep, Remember I am your daddy and I am yours to keep.

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Happy Birthday to You!

We Love and Miss You So Much Zoraya!!

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The Constitutional Right of Parents to the Care, Custody and Nurturing of their Children.

Constitutional Right to Be a ParentFlorida Parental Rights

Yesterday Fathers and Families Ohio Director was featured in their latest newsletter. Don Hubin and I have an extensive history that goes back to when he brought me into the Father’s Rights movement with an organization called Parents And Children for Equality (PACE). As a Chapter Director, one of the first assignment that I had was working on the writing of what was the very first equal custody bill ever introduced in any state legislature (HB232).

I will not go into a lot of detail but that became a real eye opener on the workings of State Government and what it takes to create a law and what is need in preparation to trying to get that law passed. I can go into the many failings of Don during that process of that bill but that experience set my resolve to get this job done for every parent across the country.

He his latest rambling for F&F he attempts to fall back on the old Constitutional Rights argument that has failed in every level of the courts and is one that I broke away from using long ago. As Senator Skindell told me when I was able to completely explain the argument, “It is too complicated and will go over a legislator’s head”.

The question that needs to be posed to Don Hubin is why when there was a bill introduced that met all these requirements that you are now calling for, why did you choose to block that legislation? Is it because you didn’t do it Don and Fathers and Families could not profit from a successful bill passing? Hate to tell you Don, that mythical pot of gold does not exist.

The best thing that we can all do is tell them to stay away. Take your fund raising efforts to the suckers that you continue to hornswoggle with your words that you fail to back up with action and go away for the betterment of every parent in the nation.

BTW- What the real truth on Fathers and Families and their actions during SB144

That is why I continue to press the single question of “Why do we remove fit parents from the lives of our children?” Like the asking for a legal definition of “Best Interest of the Child” it is the loaded question that can be explained by anyone.  ~~  

— News  –  Jul 19, 2013


Parental Rights |

Below are excerpts of case law from state appellate and federal district courts and up to the U.S. Supreme Court, all of which affirm, from one perspective or another, the absolute Constitutional right of parents to actually BE parents to their children.

The rights of parents to the care, custody and nurture of their children is of such character that it cannot be denied without violating those fundamental principles of liberty and justice which lie at the base of all our civil and political institutions, and such right is a fundamental right protected by this amendment (First) and Amendments 5, 9, and 14. ~ Doe v. Irwin, 441 F Supp 1247; U.S. D.C. of Michigan, (1985).Amendment 14 US Constitution - 2015

The several states have no greater power to restrain individual freedoms protected by the First Amendment than does the Congress of the United States. Wallace v. Jaffree, 105 S Ct 2479; 472 US 38, (1985).

Continue reading “The Constitutional Right of Parents to the Care, Custody and Nurturing of their Children.”

Dads who are in a Messy Divorce w/Kids in the Middle?

Special Kind of Hell - 2016

Are You In a Messy Divorce w/Kids in the Middle?shared-parenting

Are you in a difficult divorce with children caught in the middle? Share your story with us–Iyanla Vanzant wants to hear from you.  Candidates can live anywhere in the United States and should be available to work with Iyanla in 2016.

Please go to form and fill out the fields and share your story so we can contact you for this once in a lifetime opportunity to join Iyanla on OWN.Tell Your Story - Blog 2015Please write a brief description about the conflict you would like resolved and who else is involved.  Please understand that those on both sides of the conflict will be asked to participate on a voluntary basis.

Dads: Is Your Ex Blocking You From Your Child?Dads - Is your ex blocking you from seeing your kid - 2016

OWN: Oprah Winfrey Network is looking for dads who cannot see their kid after divorce. If you are interested please fill out the form–this initiative has nothing to do with Erasing Family so please contact them with any questions. Best of luck!

The place for everything in Oprah’s world. Get health, beauty, recipes, money, decorating and relationship advice to live your best life on Oprah.com. 

I don’t know if this is an appropriate post for this group, and I know I am not a Father, or a man – I just felt inclined to write something from the perspective of a child – that has seen a father, my father, go through what so many of you are going through.

I know I can never fully fathom what my Father had went through, let alone the pain that is in all of your hearts, after being separated from your children – it’s absolutely devastating, and sickening that Mothers can turn so manipulative and mean, and cause so much pain, using children as a manipulation tactic against you. I know even after all of my Father’s rights were taken away (literally, from weekend visits, to supervised visits) because my Mother, like many of your ex’s lied to the court system, and completely eradicated any rights he did have.

My father once fought to the extremity to just even see us, call us, talk to us for five minutes on the phone, and it makes me so sad to know how much time had been wasted, not being able to even connect with my Father. With that being said there is hope, and this is what this comment was about. I know usually it does not come granted through the court system, since it’s completely biased, and one sided, but there is hope.

Never give up, because your children, everyday, think about you. Miss you, love you, and you are in their hearts and you will forever have a place there, there is nothing in this world that could replace you, you are planted there, like a tree, with roots of love that will never be eradicated by any court system, any manipulative mother, any lies, distance or time. I know there wasn’t a day that didn’t go by I didn’t think about my Father, and despite how I was deluded at a young age into believing my Father had neglected me, and abandoned me, i came to the realization the only person who lied to me was, of course, my Mother.

Through the pain, I still carried him with me in my heart, and everything that I am now, is because of the influence of my father – the memories I carried through out the years of him, the times we had together, most of my memories are tinged with him. I know this doesn’t change any of your situations. I don’t even know if this is appropriate. Just a comment of encouragement, reminding you all, that in all of your children’s heart, you are there – and you take up the vast majority. Despite your ex’s manipulative tactics, despite everything that has happened, despite the distance and time that goes by. You are there. In their hearts, and they will grow up and come to the realization, just how great of Fathers you all are. They will perceive further than the lies that their mothers have cast out, and when the courts or their Mothers have no hold on them anymore, they will find a way back to you.

Never give up – you are their light at the end of the tunnel. No matter how hard and how painful it is – and trust me, seeing how broken my father was, I have an idea of how hard it truly is, how much pain emitted from him. Again I cannot truly understand. I just wanted to tell you all, in case you were on the verge of giving up, or thinking that it’s too late, or that the mothers have completely brainwashed them. From the eyes of a child who saw this happen to my Father, just know. You are in our hearts, forever and always.

Keep fighting.

Amber Dawn – Nov 1Tell Your Story 2 - Blog 2015

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Erasing Family is a documentary in the making that will expose how #divorce courts #erase loving families causing #parentalalienation and #familybondobstruction
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A picture is worth a thousand words… or a thousand tears.

Family Court Injustice | Get the Picture

These pictures were drawn by my daughter, and show the devastating effects of abuse and trauma, family court injustice, and court ordered parental alienation, on a child’s life. My children have had to endure and witness things no child should ever have to bear.Project Fatherhood FL 13- 2015

The picture on the left depicts our family – at the top “I Love You” is written with a smiling face next to it and a shiny heart sticker is added. Below the writing is a smiling picture of mom with her 3 children.

The picture to the right is also drawn by my daughter and shows a little girl with wide staring eyes and black scribbles drawn over her mouth, silencing her. At her side is a menacing looking man staring at her.

Continue reading “A picture is worth a thousand words… or a thousand tears.”

One is True – The Other is False

One is True – The Other is False

Attachment-Based
Parental Alienation

~ Dr Craig Childress

Excerpt:

This is the standard mental health response to all forms of child abuse.  This is the standard mental health response to physical child abuse.  This is the standard mental health response to sexual child abuse.  This is the standard mental health response to psychological child abuse.  Diagnosis guides treatment.

Pathogenic parenting that is creating significant developmental pathology in the child (diagnostic indicator 1), personality disorder pathology in the child (diagnostic indicator 2), and delusional-psychiatric pathology in the child (diagnostic indicator 3) in order to meet the emotional and psychological needs of the parent represents a DSM-5 diagnosis of V995.51 Child Psychological Abuse, Confirmed.

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